I'm Tired
My mother's lunch menu for the last couple of days: Wednesday - half a ham sandwich and a banana; Thursday - Ritz crackers w/summer sausage and a banana. Why am I telling you this? Each time she said "You give me this every day" - very irritably. Two problems - um, no Thursday was different than Wednesday and there isn't a lot she will eat. So today I gave her a hot dog w/ sliced apples. "You give me this every day" in that same irritated voice. I had to go in to the kitchen and cry. I'm trying my hardest, but when she suddenly declares that she doesn't like anything that she used to, my options are getting low. I've even tried supplements, but this one is either too sweet, or that one is too ucky. This is just a venting post. I know you don't have any magic words, I just needed to get it out.
posted by Bailey Stewart at 2:27 PM
6 Comments:
Bailey, I found your site by accident and while I have no experience that relates to yours, and no advice to give you, I was touched by your honesty and your struggles. I'll be carrying your story with me today, and keeping you and your mom in my heart. I hope that you continue to find strength (and naps) when you most need it!
Why does food mean so much more that what's on the plate? I have had these same conversations with my mother--she can be merciless with me. One night after I put her plate in front of her she took a couple of bites and then said, "You never get everything hot enough." I used to stop on the way home on Friday nights to pick up fish and chips, until one night when I'd brought it home and she looked at it and said, "I never liked fish and chips." You're right--I don't have magic words but I'm *with* you! In my more rational moments I try to remember that she's probably raging against her growing dependence on me, but most of the time I just feel so hurt. So vent away--I'm listening! (PS I love your new picture!)
Glory (I guess that's what I can call you?) - thank you for dropping by, and thanks for the kind words.
Deb - Yeah, trying to get the image closer to my real age - so now I'm only about 10 years off. LOL I heard somewhere (and don't ask this tired mind to say where) that their tastebuds change too. I know her's has. A majority of the things that she used to like, she doesn't anymore, so it's getting harder to find things to feed her.
My mother is exactly the opposite. She has a tendency to fuss when I get too creative with her food, but I do it anyway, usually to good results. I have to watch out for noodles, though, if they are not in Mac & Cheese. She claims she hates noodles, notices them in everything and simply won't each much of anything with noodles in it. Except Mac & Cheese. Those, you know, aren't noodles!
Gail - I'm sorry, I'm laughing at the noodle thing - of course they're different. *gg* It's getting frustrating because the things that she ate last month she suddenly says she doesn't like and never did - I'm running out of things to feed her. And I worry about nutrition - it's not like she doesn't need to lose weight, but I can't find a supplement that she likes. Oh, and to give you an example of the food idiosyncricies (oh God, I've forgotten how to spell) - did you know that bananas are too sweet? News to me.
I'm so sorry that things are getting to be so hard. Its ironic that some things really work for some people and not for others - my mom does better eating the same thing every day; every night she eats a turkey sandwich. She craves the routine of it. Also, I don't know if you'll find this with your mom, but my mom is like more foods she liked as a kid and less adult type foods.
I'm sorry that you're mom's giving you such a hard time. You know that its a part of the disease though and that you're taking good care of her.
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